I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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