Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
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Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
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theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"