when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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