sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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