he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
