Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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