Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
