Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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