32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
