Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (737): View more from Texas

  You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?

  (1-737): View more from Texas

  That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there

  (737): View more from Texas

  It's my parent's restaurant

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  (737): You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot? (1-737): That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there (737): It's my parent's restaurant http://tfl.nu/0xzo
  Replies (8) Good night (1033) Bad night (2672)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.

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  (207): We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math. http://tfl.nu/vxcn
  Replies (85) Good night (1461) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented

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  (618): bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented http://tfl.nu/qz6v
  Replies (35) Good night (7280) Bad night (1346)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.

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  (321): mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday. http://tfl.nu/054y
  Replies (10) Good night (5102) Bad night (902)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.

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  (716): i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing. http://tfl.nu/i263
  Replies (10) Good night (3186) Bad night (857)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.

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  (720): He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED. http://tfl.nu/xnx5
  Replies (8) Good night (3078) Bad night (1551)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'

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  (954): They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home' http://tfl.nu/2uct
  Replies (4) Good night (2184) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".

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  (973): Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise". http://tfl.nu/r9vi
  Replies (7) Good night (960) Bad night (1957)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.

  (845): View more from New York

  Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.

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  (845): There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help. (845): Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me. http://tfl.nu/1wp4
  Replies (5) Good night (2986) Bad night (743)
• Favorite

  (+01): View more from

  I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom

  (1+01): View more from

  your the Dr. Phil in my life

  (+01): View more from

  Today is an unchanging day

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  (+01): I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom (1+01): your the Dr. Phil in my life (+01): Today is an unchanging day http://tfl.nu/6nwn
  Replies (1) Good night (932) Bad night (402)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?

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  (778): they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date? http://tfl.nu/4653
  Replies (1) Good night (440) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday

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  (+61): Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday http://tfl.nu/1mqu
  Replies (5) Good night (533) Bad night (771)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time

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  (860): It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time http://tfl.nu/gqs4
  Replies (1) Good night (557) Bad night (258)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.

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  (209): Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic. http://tfl.nu/l3e3
  Replies (4) Good night (1030) Bad night (219)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch

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  (518): Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch http://tfl.nu/1zpa
  Replies (2) Good night (298) Bad night (457)

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