That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
