we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
