man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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