They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
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Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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