who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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