you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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