they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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