Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
