I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
