The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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