I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I need mimosas to revive my soul
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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