Please don't use social media to get back at me.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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