My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
This house was built for laser tag.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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