Kiss
Puke
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize