Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
should my penis look like a turkey
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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