I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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