she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
