This is not my ceiling
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
