Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize