Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
