I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.