Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  What does that mean?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  How when the cu k dos I yet u

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  Focus

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  (248): fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!! (1-248): What does that mean? (248): How when the cu k dos I yet u (1-248): Focus http://tfl.nu/kvgv
  Replies (13) Good night (1909) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.

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  (803): I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway. http://tfl.nu/iohv
  Replies (8) Good night (1713) Bad night (849)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...

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  (310): It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass... http://tfl.nu/egbe
  Replies (69) Good night (1455) Bad night (4541)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.

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  (413): He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m. http://tfl.nu/2wu4
  Replies (24) Good night (1293) Bad night (4963)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.

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  (253): You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me. http://tfl.nu/6xwb
  Replies (17) Good night (3965) Bad night (796)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  he asked me to hangout with him...and his son

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  (413): he asked me to hangout with him...and his son http://tfl.nu/p42y
  Replies (17) Good night (953) Bad night (5307)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.

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  (817): I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve. http://tfl.nu/17gc
  Replies (12) Good night (8147) Bad night (958)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!

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  (817): Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?! http://tfl.nu/9bqy
  Replies (10) Good night (2001) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.

  (747): View more from California

  Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.

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  (256): I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks. (747): Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either. http://tfl.nu/6mbq
  Replies (22) Good night (3948) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.

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  (604): It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good. http://tfl.nu/yhf8
  Replies (0) Good night (970) Bad night (478)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.

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  (417): It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday. http://tfl.nu/s40o
  Replies (15) Good night (2386) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.

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  (702): Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom. http://tfl.nu/ihoh
  Replies (25) Good night (3210) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation

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  (406): I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation http://tfl.nu/qkc0
  Replies (6) Good night (1372) Bad night (806)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party

  (1-647): View more from Ontario

  That was you...

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  (647): You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party (1-647): That was you... http://tfl.nu/3f5k
  Replies (4) Good night (1206) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner

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  (724): I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner http://tfl.nu/mu1f
  Replies (2) Good night (242) Bad night (484)

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