just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
