Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
