i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
