WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
