that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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