I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize