I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
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