Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
