I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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