Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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