That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
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Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
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I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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