i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
He is an equal opportunity slut.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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