can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
