what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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