Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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