i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster