I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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