white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
