Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
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Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
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I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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